IWSG: Where did January go?

 

    Somehow, the entire month of January blipped past like I just blinked and missed it.

    I mean, I know part of why that is (*cough*gaming*cough*) but there's also a mysterious futility to it, like my whole life is just flashing by and I can't even reach out to grab it.  It doesn't help that my health is still awful--though my brother tricking me into watching a scary movie and me losing a whole night of sleep therefore and seeing my heart going absolutely insane the next day at least provided me with a good clue that I've been habitually not getting enough sleep for decades now, a problem I am slowly trying to remedy--but that's definitely not all of it.

    My writing has been blocked lately.  I'm the sort who can't put a project down partway through a draft if I ever want to finish it, and after having spent the majority of last year working on a single project, I can't risk not finishing it!  (Not to mention that I really do want to finish it...)  But I keep running up against plot points that I'm not sure how to resolve.  (And I'm the sort who can't write out of order, too, so I need to deal with each issue in its due place...)  I think the light is showing at the end of the tunnel now, though:  my current outline section actually goes all the way up to the actual end of the story!  Admittedly, with some scenes that have their node on the outline saying things like "something else needs to happen here, but i'm not sure what" and "jc isn't getting to do much lately and he's supposed to be the lead; give him something to do!" and the epilogue is a list of bullet points prefaced with "not sure the order yet, and there's probably some more needed" but...still, I have the plan of how to reach "The End" mostly in place.

    And yet.  I still haven't written in a few days (uh, as of when I'm pre-writing this post on Monday) because I know that one of the characters needs to do something to disable the magical teleportation the bad guys have been using, and that he needs the doctor to make some kind of powder or something to do it, but I'm not sure what kind of powder or why he needs to ask for her help, specifically, since anti-evil is his own field, not hers.  I mean, I know he wants to ask for her help to distract her from her own problems (in self-defense she accidentally took the life of someone who was trying to kill her, and everyone around her assumes she's shattered by that, so they're sort of coddling her) but he needs some kind of excuse that she'll accept, and that is really hard to come up with.  Okay, no, now I've written a bit, because I realized the obvious solution to all that strikethrough stuff, but still kind of struck a wall in the scene where I wasn't sure what else needed to be said before the rest of the scene's contents could happen.  Which sounds weird, but...

    It's very frustrating, but that feels like my whole life has boiled down to nothing but a whole mess of "frustration," and little to nothing else.

    *sigh*

    Sorry.  I seem to have spent yet another monthly post just whinging on about my own petty problems.

    (But, really, there's not much else I can talk about unless I allow myself to start waxing poetic over My Time at Sandrock...and this is supposed to be a writer's group, not a gamer's group, so...)